In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
