Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
