There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
