WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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