We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
