a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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