so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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