no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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