You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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