just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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