Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
