Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Randomize
