im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
it was like eating out sand paper
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
How does one acquire holy water?
pray to the hookup gods
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
