I swear she didn't look like that last week.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
