My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
