I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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