I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
