Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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