Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize