Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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