I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
