You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
