Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
