I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
