I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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