She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
