im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
