Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
