I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
