In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Success! We fucked roommates!
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
