He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
