I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize
