end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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