What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Pooping to opera.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
