you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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