we have officially mastered the walk of shame
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
