he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
