5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize