If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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