I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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