So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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