I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
