Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
