I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i think i just lost a toe
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