my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
as a side note pls kill me
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
