Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
