he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
