walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
