when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I will die if light touches me.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize