i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
